'am lost.. mayotteru...

im lost... huhuhu

 

gosh! haha!! I wrote one long ranting about my pathetic boring life in general and it was gone! gone with the wind.. babye! i wasn't able to post it.. haha.. my first attempt to have a nice long babbling about how my life is not worth living's gone.. haha.. maybe it's a good thing... because that way, I wont be able to read and re-read again and again how crappy my life is... i can concentrate on the blessings I have. so what if I don't have a bf? Heck! it's my choice! hmm...who am i kidding?? admit it! i don't have a bf coz he doesn't want me back.. and that's it. get over it. done! so long! good bye! Babush! anyway, i still believe it's not my loss... or is it?

Anyway, i'm going home now. 9:30 pm now.. 12 hrs at the office.. wow! what a day! but I don't feel tired.. not at all.. hungry though. hoping for a nice dinner at home.

posted by: hyde_chan at 20:35 | link | comments |

How to make a hmdeguzman

Ingredients: 3 parts success 1 part silliness 1 part joy

Method: Blend at a low speed for 30 seconds. Serve with a slice of wisdom and a pinch of salt. Yum!

posted by: hyde_chan at 19:46 | link | comments |

Y do I feel my day's complete just by seeing you?

Y am I devastated when you're not here?

Y do my problems seem to disappear when I look at you?

Y am I suffering yet I don't want to end it?

Y does it feel so wonderful when you show you care?

Y do I have to endure the pain, knowing I will never have you?

Y do I care so much about you?

Y do you make me smile? Cry?

Y am I thinking of you?

Y do I feel nervous and courageous at the same time?

Y can you make me feel weak yet I can move mountains for you?

Y do I love you?

DAMN IT!

Y can't YOU see I love you?

**** a friend asked me the questions below:

Bakit masakit kapag may masamang nangyari?

Bakit masakit rin kapag walang nangyayari??

Bakit masakit pa rin kapag may mabuting nangyari???

-- and I have no idea WHY?

- Pag-alam nyo sagot sa mga tanong ko, sabihin nyo. ..

Anyway, ba't ko nga ba pinag-aaksayahan ng panahon ang mga bagay na ito.. sayang sa braincells ko. . Nakakainis nga! Siya ba alam ba nya ang nangyayari sa akin? Nararamdaman ba nya ang mga nararamdaman ko? Nahihirapan ba sya tulad ng paghihirap ko? Malamang HINDI!! HINDI at HINDI!! Nakakainis diba!? Ni wala siyang ideya sa lahat ng mga pinagdaraanan ko! this is so unfair! darn it! Bahala na! KEBER! His loss, not mine anyway... but then...

* Rantings of a deranged  psychopath  girl..

 

posted by: hyde_chan at 21:14 | link | comments (2) |

Grey Test

Your choice is:
421
"Grey" colors assessment points to issues involving your state at this moment in this circumstances.

Aspiration (rush) + compulsion + distrust.You persistently long to free yourself from the burden of a relationship because you consider it to be devoid of confidence and tenderness.

- WHAT THE!?!! What relationship!? If I have this kind of relationship, Im sure iniwan ko na matagal na! but then, baka MARTYR ako..haha.. Anyway, i have no idea how this result came out after just choosing white, black and gray.

http://www.psycorr.com/Psich/greyE.htm

Yellow Test
Your choice is: 1320

"Yellow colors" assessment points to expects and attitudes to social surroundings.
You feel disappointed and are therefore cautious in your behavior and outlook. You set up distance between yourself and others in order to avoid criticism and rejection. You are guarded because you fear that you will be underestimated. You don't wish to deceive yourself with illusions.

- hmmm.. I set up distance to other people when, first and foremost, I don't like them, or I just don't know them.. I fear that I'll  be underestimated?? Why? oh well.. di ko to maintindihan.

http://www.psycorr.com/Psich/yellowE.htm

Red Test
Your choice is: 0231

"Red Colors" assessment points to level of excitability and impetuosity.
You intently develop your activities and wait for others to involve themselves in an effective and secure manner. You feel that you are generally misunderstood by others. Above all, you are afraid of experienceing a dissatisfied and critical feeling of discontent and so develop intense interests and long for the new and exciting.

- AKO? di ata ako ito..I feel that I'm generally misunderstood?? Pakialam ko how other people perceive me.!? ayaw sa akin ayoko din. iilang tao lang ang gusto ko na i-like din ako. and minimal yun!
 
http://www.psycorr.com/Psich/redE.htm

Blue Test
Your choice is: 0231

"Blue Colors" assessment points to issues involving your satisfaction with and attitude towards your partner.

You object to your current emotional relationship which you experience as unsatisfying and as undermining your self-esteem and dignity. You strive to remain unaffected by others and avoid being carried away by your emotions in order to keep your independence.

- HHHMMM..... So far, eto pa lang ata ang mukhang true upto the last dot.. Astig! CREEPY!

http://www.psycorr.com/Psich/blueE.htm

 

Green test

Your choice is: 0321

"Green Colors" asessment points to issues involving will and self control.
You stain your will to deny the satisfaction of what you believe to be unsuitable desires and you guard yourself from being unduly influenced by external circumstances. You strive to establish yourself at all costs. Thus, you sometimes give up even profitable activities and you don't yield to any hardships.

- eto... i still have to think and meditate and talk 1x1 with  my inner self to see if this is true... hahaha

http://www.psycorr.com/Psich/greenE.htm

posted by: hyde_chan at 19:44 | link | comments |

 Monday Mornin' Woes!

I'm sure LAHAT ng nagttrabaho at nag-aaral ay ayaw ng monday! I hate monday lalo na ang monday morning..parang gusto
ko balikan ang higaan ko.

At kanina umaga, lalo ko hate ang monday morning! Kasi ubod ng sakit ng katawan ko. i woke up
earlier than usual, 7am (usually 8 na) then i realized I coudn't move a muscle!!nagising nga ako
kasi masakit eh.  I'm suffering
from DOMS a.k.a Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness... KaTAngaHaN naman kasi! Anupa't nag-PE ako ng stretching
(oy, wag kayong tumawa! No choice po ako nun saka kasama ko sina armi) kung di ko alam ang mangyayari sa akin kapag
gumawa ng strenuous activity at di manlang ako nag-stretching!

Syempre to achieve my ultimate goal now to have an OVERALL Wellness*, ako po ay nag-exercise kahapon! ako ay nag-tennis sa UP ng 2 hrs. Yung malapit sa Engg. And, knowing me na walang exercise at walang sports (hmm..meron naman pala, table tennis minsan.. volleyball noon..crunches every morning and evening, mga tig 15 lang. haha..la silbi.. unless window shopping can be considered an exercise! magaling ako dyan!) syempre sasakit talaga ngyon ng katawan ko. To think na 1st time ko lang nagTennis! Lahat nga ng posibleng direksyon, nararating ng bola ko eh.
Dapat talaga nag-stretching ako before I started.. huli na ang lahat when i realized na
magkaka-DOMS ako! so nagstretching ako after ng laro.. then kagabi, had a nice back massage with
aroma therapy oil, lavender/vanilla scent ata,  courtesy of non other than, janjararaannnn.... my mom syempre! sino pa ba!
Pero, bottom line - pakiramdam ko pa rin ay isang malaking pasa ang buong likod ko.. di lang ata likod. buong katawan , mainly back, shoulder caps, butt and thighs..

So kanina, i was contemplating hard kung papasok ba ako sa office or magwork fr home.. pero nakakahiya.. la ako dahilan sa boss ko to WFH, at umpisa pa lang ng taon!.. kaya eto, nagpakamartyr ako.
Una, nagstretch ng onti pagkagising to minimize the pain.. at nung mej nakakalakad na ako, naligo na ako.Kaso nalate pa rin ako! kasi naman ang MRT napaka-daming tao!! Tagal pa dumating ng tren! tapos yung unang tren, nagskip pa! syempre inis to the max na ang mga tao na ang tagal naghihintay.
Ang sakit na nga ng katawan ko, ang bigat pa ng bag ko. tapos matutulak ka pa ng mga pesteng commuters!
oh well, para di masira ang day ko, pinapanood ko nalang ang mga tao...
may nag-aaway sa MRT na dalawa lalaki. Nagumpisa lang sa sabi ng isa - 'pare wag ka manulak..
ayun, mej nagsagutan na sila.. haha! kakatuwa! tapos ang ginaw ginaw sa tapat ng upuan ko.. tapat ng aircon. ako nga na naka-jacket giniginaw.. iniimagine ko yung katabi ko, how she felt eh naka tshirt lang sya.. So, i looked for evidences na giniginaw sya.. at syempre, ginaw na ginaw sya! yung balat nya parang balat na ng manok! haha.. ang bad ko..

Pero syempre, di pa rin nababawasan sakit ng katawan ko.. at habang nakaupo ako sa harap ng comp now, lalo sya sumasakit.. So, ang aral sa akin, magstretching araw-araw!Lalo na pagmaglaro. ARAY!

*Overall wellness - ie.right amount of exercise, proper diet, MINIMAL stress sa work or atleast think that way kahit super stress,
having time for myself(mentally, spiritually), seeing frends - old and new, reading a book a month, watching new movies
[yes! part yan ang overall wellness plan ko!]

posted by: hyde_chan at 14:12 | link | comments |

coooolll.. i can post pictures.. wehehe...(wow! what a discovery!great!GRRR)  i'm still trying to figure out my way here! seems like every time i go to other folk's blogs, 'can't find my way home!!    then, i also don't know how to add folks to the link section.. hehe.. me techy savvy! really! 

grrr!! I thought i can add pics?? but why can't I see it after posting it? tasukete kure yo.  still, i can't open LJ!! there i know how to post pics but here, i'm at loss agen..

Anyway, I can't open LJ today.. it's :

Temporarily Unavailable

LiveJournal is currently down due to a massive power failure at our data center. We'll provide updates at /powerloss/ as they're available.

DaRn!

posted by: hyde_chan at 00:20 | link | comments |

 ggrrrr!!! Why Am i here?? Why am i wasting my precious time trying to figure out how to use this?? somebody help! ggrrr!!! thisi s someone's fault! If you'll read this, tasukete kure!  

posted by: hyde_chan at 17:45 | link | comments (1) |